1999 Invitation
As requested by the Council of the Diggers of Golf, specifically the sub-committees of Finance and Sports & Recreation, you are hereby invited to attend the 14th Diggers Olympiad, a contest of cerebral and physiological exactitude to be decided by a challenge of a vicissitudinous and manifestly contrived nature, and in the presence of an assembly of your peers and assorted malfeasants, on the shores of a near (or far)-flung principality or state, in a place of serene tranquillity and haute temperature, there to compete under the auspices of the International Diggers Committee (herein unto referred to as the IDC) in a competition of venerable stature and divine comedy (that's a band, isn't it?), there to contend in a challenge of unutterable severity on thisdate, the annual denouement that is the Diggers Challenge, without prejudice, jaundice or diphtheria, in a contest of games and sportsmanship un-heralded in the modern era, there to loquate and wibble in a manner not unbecoming of gentlefolk, to dabble in the pursuit of golfing excellence and with the intent of participation there-in, pursuant to the rules and regulations here-within ascribed and notwithstanding the limitations of reason and good governance, to pursue a course of engenderment of ethereal frivolity, trivial provenance and jolly countenance.
Gentlemen, start your golf-carts.
